BREAKING: Malia Obama Just Gave Her Parents Some Devastating News

Former first daughter and professional pot smoker Malia Obama has delivered a crushing blow to her parents. She’s deferring her college education and internship with the Spanish Ambassador to the UN for three years…so she can raise her child.

 That’s right. The young Obama has decided to go the way of so many other wayward liberal girls and gotten herself pregnant. While there doesn’t seem to be any kind of talk of marriage or even a father in the baby’s life, there has been talk of who is responsible. The list of suspected baby daddies includes “Souldja Boy,” “Shifty D” and a man named Dennis who was a staffer in the West Wing.

Souldja Boy

Mrs. Obama, after unsuccessfully trying to convince her daughter to “terminate the pregnancy,” has vowed to be the world’s greatest Gammy and once again insisted that she doesn’t want to run for President in 2020. Most of the liberal political world has been silent about the news.

Conservatives, on the other hand, have been waving the flag of “I told you so” all day. Between their loose morals, lack of prayer and questionable family values, it’s a wonder more high profile liberals don’t run into this problem. Of course, most will point fingers at the wonderful mother and role model for all young women, Bristol Palin, and say her accidental pregnancies make this somehow OK.

Bristol is a sweet young girl who made a mistake or three. Malia Obama is a pothead. You decide who’s the better qualified to raise a child.

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